The Reflux (ok, bad pun on the old Dur@n Dur@n song)

Wow, my baby girl is 6 weeks old! So much has been happening, and we've learned a ton...

What I originally thought was a milk allergy was in fact reflux. Apparently all babies have some degree of reflux, which is what causes spit-up. However, some babies have it to a greater extent, which makes them really uncomfortable as the acids in their stomach come back up, and this even interferes with their sleep and possibly weight gain (this wasn't an issue with my girl). She would also fuss quite a bit during and after feedings, arching her back and howling like she was in a great deal of pain (which I believe she was). The crying was getting to be so intense, often, and prolonged that we uttered the dreaded words...was it colic? And she couldn't sleep longer than 1.5 hours at a time during the day and night, when previously she took beautiful naps - she'd wake up constantly from gagging and coughing, the poor thing. So off we went to the pediatrician, who diagnosed it as reflux and prescribed Prev@cid. I was in turmoil about giving my girl meds at such a young age, but after careful delibration with hubby, we decided it was worth it if it could ease her pain and allow her to rest.

She's been on the meds for just over a week, and we are seeing a difference. It's not 100%, but I understand this may take a week or two to see the full extent of the improvement. One wonderful tidbit to report - she's now "sleeping through the night", which, according to the docs that study this sort of thing equals any amount greater than 5 hours. She's sleeping for a 6 hour stretch, which means I only have to get up for one night-time feeding! She's also sleeping in her car seat so she'll be more upright, which seems to really keep things from backing up as well. I may try one of those special wedge pillows that holds baby at a 30 degree angle, but am not totally decided on that point yet. Baby was previously a very noisy sleeper (clearing her throat constantly, gagging, coughing), and now she now sleeps soundly and wakes up rested and happy!

Breastfeeding is going well now. My milk supply is well established, and I also pump milk for hubby to feed her sometimes or for when Grandma babysits. DH and I actually got away on a "date" last week, and it was great!

Ok, now for some total honestly. I love my girl. I didn't right away. Don't get me wrong, I knew that I would at some point. But in the early days and weeks, I didn't feel like I knew her, and I was so overwhelmed at recoving from the c-section and learning how to be a Mom that it was all I could handle to breastfeed, change diapers, eat, and sleep. I didn't know how to soothe her when her crying jags started (before we figured out it was reflux and brought her some relief). I was actually a bit scared of her, and wasn't willing to be left alone with her, to the chagrin of my husband. Now, I feel like her Mom, and I really, deeply love her. And her crying doesn't freak me out anymore. Certain of her cries actually make me laugh, and others just make me melt. And she's starting to smile, which is a whole other reward in and of itself. It feels like a pat on the back for getting this far. And she's starting to coo, and of course I'm pulling for her first words to be Mama :) So I feel like I can handle this parenting thing. At least today.