Why I Keep This Blog Public

It's tempting to go private with this blog. I'd love to be able to share pictures of my daughter and family, but wouldn't risk doing so unless the blog was restricted. And I love being allowed the privilege of reading your private blogs, and sharing in your lives in a more intimate way.

However, from time to time, I receive emails from folks who've read my blog, can relate to it, and are in a similar situation. They ask me a lot of the same questions I had when I was first faced with the grim reality of azoospermia. They also ask me lots of questions about what to consider when going the DI route. Sometimes they just need a friend who understands what they're going through. It's amazing to me what the blogosphere has done for me, and what it allows me to offer others. This is why I keep my blog public, for all of you gals who might need it as a reference for your own lives, and who might get just a little bit of comfort knowing that someone else has gone through the same thing and come out the other side a pretty darn happy person. So please feel free to email me with questions. I don't check this account every day, but do check it regularly. I will respond to your email.

I'm glad to have gotten that off my chest. It's a topic I haven't really touched on during the lifespan of this blog, but has felt like a private side thing that I wanted to acknowledge.

In other pregnancy news...I'm still very tired and queasy. I'll be 11 weeks on Friday, and had my first OB appointment this week. It went well - they even did a quick ultrasound, and everything looked good with the baby. It's tough to juggle work with first-trimester pregnancy symptoms, but I get by. Luckily, I have a very supportive boss who I also consider a friend. I can't believe how much I'm showing already, but my OB assured me this is normal for a second pregnancy, what with the stretched out stomach muscles (lovely).

Question (please don't judge me) - is it possible to get a tummy tuck/lipo right after a c-section? I figure if I'm on the operating table anyway...would be fabulous to be able to get my tummy back in order!

A Good Update

Wow, it's been a long time since I've posted. After 2 unsuccessful IVF cycles to conceive with the original donor sperm that gave us our lovely daughter, we cut bait and switched donors.

The first time I purchased donor sperm, I only purchased 6 vials, and it took me 5 vials to get pregnant. I foolishly didn't think about purchasing more, and got screwed when we wanted to TTC again and I learned the donor had retired.

This time, I purchased 8 vials, and took 1 IUI cycle and 2 vials to get pregnant! Yes folks, I am 6 weeks pregnant as of last Friday, and we saw/heard the heartbeat at the RE's office yesterday.

I have all the usual symptoms I had last time...HUGE mood swings (...one minute, my husband is a complete buffoon, and the next minute, all is fine...), very sore boobs, sudden hunger attacks, morning/noon/night sickness. This time around, I also have an energetic toddler underfoot (she's 2.5 years old now - how did that happen??), and I am trying to teach her it's not ok to kick/head butt, or otherwise bring any force to Mommy's tummy. Wish me luck on that one. Otherwise, just color me tickled that we are on this journey once again, albeit the path was not a "typical" one.

Hope everyone is well.

I Must Be Crazy

I must be crazy. I have an adorable little girl who gets cooler by the second. I have an amazing husband who absolutely loves our daughter but doesn't forget to devote time to "us". And I have a pretty darn cool dog to boot.

But alas, I want to keep torturing myself and my body so we can have another baby. Yes! I would LOVE to stick needles in my belly repeatedly until I run out of good spots. Yes! Give me more of that hormonal craziness otherwise known as Clomid! Yes! I love being on emotional roller-coasters - sign me up for a triple-dose!

I must be crazy, because I'm about to start all over again - this time with new donor sperm, cause we ran out of the other stuff and the donor probably graduated from college and has the financial means to not need to donate anymore. God give me strength.

No go

Not pregnant, even though I really thought I was. I'm bummed.

Waiting on 2 Counts

Since I was too lazy to write a thorough post the other day, I thought I'd come back and post a new entry so you all understand what's on the minds of DH and I. You see, we're waiting to see how this cycle goes on a couple of counts:

1. Are we pregnant?
2. If pregnant, is it 1 or 2?

You see, we transferred two embryos on the advice of our RE. This has us a bit nervous because the thought of twins is a little scary and overwhelming. Don't get me wrong - we would be happy with either 1 or 2, and will take whatever God gives. But at the same time, I'd be lying if I said my head didn't spin a bit at the thought of twins!

We should know the answer to question #1 on Tuesday, and question #2 at the 6/8 week ultrasound. Otherwise, they did have 1 embryo that they were able to freeze, so if this cycle doesn't pan out then we'll have 1 more shot! Stay tuned...

Transfer Complete

The transfer didn't happen on Saturday, but occurred today instead. Other than being uncomfortable from having a full bladder, it was easy-peasy. We decided to transfer two embryos based on how they'd been graded, and now we'll just wait and see! My back is killing me, so this is going to be a short post so I can go lie down. I've also been having trouble sleeping; feels just like when I was at the end of my pregnancy and couldn't sleep - except I'm not even pregnant yet! I wonder if it's a side-effect of the progesterone and other assorted drugs (endometrum or something like that) they have me taking. Anybody know?

The Easter Egg Hunt was a Success

The egg retrieval was yesterday, and it went really well. I was most nervous about the stinkin' IV, because I had a horrible experience with seasoned nurses not catching a vein prior to my c-section. They all shook their heads in confusion and tried to reassure me by saying "this has never happened to me...I can always hit a vein..." Needless to say, this didn't help the fact that they were poking me repeatedly in both arms, doing the fish-around with the needle (I HATE that), and still not having success. My arms were bruised for weeks.

Anyway, my RE happens to use this cool pre-numbing agent and I didn't even feel the needle go in. I was so excited about that! Once I got into the OR, I passed out almost immediately. Them's was some good drugs they gave me. Next thing I knew, I was back in the recovery room and not remembering a darn thing anyone was saying to me (hubby was pretty amused with this). The anesthesiologist (not sure if I spelled that right but too lazy to look it up) came in and told me things went well, they got all 8 follicles...I nodded and asked him how things went and how many eggs did they get? :)

I got a call this morning, and 7 were fertilized! So things are looking good and we're tentatively planning for a Day 3 transfer (Saturday).

I must say I am shocked at how many people have commented on my last post - it is so nice to see all my old friends! I still need to catch up with everyone to see how you're all doing, so please give me a few days to check in with all of you.

In the meantime, happy Thursday!